IDIOT OF THE WEEK:

Okay so I’m driving downtown to meet some of my friends for appetizers and beers. Specifically calamari. Damn I love that stuff. I had probably had calamari about 10 times before someone leaned over and told me, “Dude, you know that’s squid, right?” By that time it was too late. They could have told me it was made of old boots. I was already hooked. After all, it’s deep fried isn’t it? But I digress…

So I’m in my car (’97 Toyota Corolla baby!) and I’m climbing up levels in the parking garage. And this place is packed. Evidently, I wasn’t the only one with calamari on the brain because every spot was filled. I’m talking about “giant diesel turbo-charged trucks parked in the compact spots” packed. Frankly, I take exception to that. I’m pretty open to almost any type of vehicle parking in compact spots but you have to draw the line somewhere. When I see a turbocharged Cummins diesel giant parked in a compact spot, as a compact car driver I get a little offended! That’s like me being handicap and having to wait while you, a regular joe, stinks up my stall. You don’t need those handrails man! But I digress yet again.

So the dude in front of me comes to a stop. So I stop my little Toyota Corolla safely behind him assuming that he is waiting for someone to pull out. If only I had gotten there seconds earlier, I would have been the one waiting and would be closer to hot crispy calamari. Alas, it was not so.

All of a sudden the guy in front of me (who will hereafter be referred to as “dude”, throws his car into reverse and starts backing up for no apparent reason at all! I lay it on the horn but he’s coming back to fast and *CRUNCH!*. Dude nailed my beautiful Toyota Corolla. Getting out of the car I know that I am instantly in the market for some Toyota Corolla parts. Pushed in grill, broken headlights, and upon further inspection, one banged up Toyota Corolla radiator. Hooray.

Naturally, before I checked out my car I gave Dude the ol’ “What the hell were you doing?” to which he muttered, “I was just trying to get out of here.” Let’s stop and think about that for a second. Instead of using the designated exits, his course of logic told him to throw his car into reverse… and then back up really fact without looking in his mirror. That’s like being stuck in traffic and reversing on the freeway to the last exit you just missed. Or, in other words: it’s stupid. Really stupid.

So now I have a confession to make. Through this course of events, I learned that I really do love my Toyota Corolla. I mean, I talk bad about it to my friends who all have nicer cars, but that thing is tiny and fun to drive. I can pull off turns that no vehicle should be able to make. So I found myself in the position of wanting the highest quality Toyota Corolla parts. The insurance company gave me a check and I hit the road shopping. I started with the radiator. My first instinct was to head over to the dealer where they no doubt carry authentic Toyota radiators. And they do. They just cost more than a freakin’ plasma TV. I couldn’t believe my ears when they told me what they wanted for Toyota Corolla parts. I love my Corolla, but not THAT much.

So what next? I checked out a bunch of auto parts wholesale and auto parts warehouse places. They’re prices were still a little inflated, but the worst part was the 16 year olds behind the counter. I’m pretty sure that none of them had even heard of a Toyota Corolla before. Actually, I’m not sure any of them had even seen a car before. Okay, maybe that’s being a little extreme but I had no confidence that they would know enough to order me the right part. For example, they gave me a price without even asking me the year of the car. I may not be some mechanical guru, but I’m pretty sure somewhere in the evolution of Toyota Corolla parts they changed the design of the radiator at least once.

So I checked the phone book and came across a phone number. Radiator Hotline. It was like finding a nugget of gold in a pot of dirt. These guys asked me incredibly detailed questions, explained to my WHY they were asking me those questions, and sold me a discount Corolla radiator for half of where I had seen it anywhere else. And when I got this thing, it was put together better than the one I bought the car with! Not only that, but they checked into their database for me and helped me find a parts guy that they had a good relationship with. They got us both on the phone and introduced us and this guy ended up getting me the rest of my Toyota Corolla parts for next to nothing. And these were quality parts, mind you! I got my entire dilemma handled with one phone call!

The only real complaint I had with Radiator Hotline was their lack of calamari. Never did get to eat some of that.

That’s all for now.

-Geno

My brother in Portland recently bought a Honda Civic Hybrid. He called me to talk about his experience as I plan on my next car payment going towards a more fuel-efficient and environmentally conscious car. He knew I was in the aftermarket radiator business and the first thing he told me was that the Honda Civic radiator for his hybrid looked much like the a regular radiator and he asked me how changing fuel efficiency standards affected the radiator business.

I started to tell him how a replacement radiator is needed to cool most engines regardless of whether or not a gas engine was assisted by an electric motor when he tuned me out. “You know, I thought I’d get a few more looks from the ladies, especially some of the hippies out here but most people can’t tell this is a hybrid. I should have got the Prius,” he lamented. My suspicions that my brother’s purchase had less to do about the environment and more to do with his libido were confirmed. I told him an all aluminum Honda radiator might score with the ladies but he saw through my ploy to sell him a more expensive Honda part.

1-800-Radiator is currently in the process of expanding product line to include HVAC air parts, all of which will be in demand, even as state and federal legislators require the automotive industry to think ‘green.’

Let me tell you something about my truck. I love it.

Now before all of you hybrid car driving environmentalists show up on my doorstep with pitchforks and torches, allow me to clarify. I’m one of the few pickup truck drivers that actually use the vehicle for functional purposes. I tow things. I lift things. I move things. I truck, dammit.

Now, I’ve been through all brands of trucks. I’ve had a Ford truck, Chevy truck and a Dodge truck. And no matter how dependable those commercials on television (Y’know, the ones with the cowboys and John Cougar Mellencamp songs) say that their truck is, there is one part that invariably goes out every time. The radiator.

Truck radiators are magnets for destruction, I kid you not. Whether you’re towing a trailer, carrying a load of dirt, or simply strapping a giant elephant into the bed of the truck (Which I do every Wednesday. Don’t ask.) you should know that your truck radiator is eventually going to blow. There’s only so much cooling a radiator can do on an overstressed engine and, trust me on this one, radiator repair will only get you so far. A repaired radiator will at best cool to 80% capacity as a new radiator will because even if they flushed it, it’s still full of buildup that is now somehow physically part of the radiator. I’m not even sure how it gets that bad. Clearly, I should have watched more Mr. Wizard as a kid.

So needless to say, with all of the truckery (I just made that word up) that I do, I find myself buying a new truck radiator at least once every 4-5 years or so. It’s not like the radiators I buy are defective; in fact they’re some of the highest quality parts I’ve ever seen, it’s that I put that much strain on my trucks. Still, it doesn’t hurt to do some research to ensure that one gets a discounted truck radiator. Personally, I know I’ll get as much mileage out of it as I would an OEM Ford, Chevy, or Dodge truck radiator, so why would I throw away up to 200 extra dollars that can be better spent on can after can of alphabet soup? God I love alphabet soup. I’m eating a bowl right now. I spilled a “Q” in my keyboard. It’s wedged in the little space between the “N” key and the “M” key which ironically isn’t anywhere near the “Q” key.

That’s all for now.

- Geno

In 2003 I was teaching 6th graders in the Oakland CA Unified School District when I had an epiphany. I was cleaning a smeared Grape Jelly sandwich off of my chalkboard while admonishing a student who, while criticizing another student with a “Your Mom” joke had used a double negative, when it hit me. I really love teaching but there must be another way to make a living in California. The job hunt was on.

I am not good with cars. As a matter of fact, I’ve never changed my own oil, a tire and if truth be told, I do not even know how to program a radio station in our Volkswagen Jetta. I never saw myself in the auto parts industry, let alone working for the nation’s largest distributors of radiators, Radiator Warehouse. Yet at the end of the summer, I started learning about the difference between plastic tanks, radiator repair, when you need a new radiator and other car part components that help cool your car’s engine. Somehow I was able to parlay my experience teaching kids into a call center environment managing students of The Radiator.

I quickly came to realize how much radiators were in demand and found myself talking to friends and relatives about the difference in core measurement between a Chevy truck radiator and a Honda Civic radiator. As the company grew and eventually started franchising, I became more enthusiastic about the radiator market. Though I still miss the occasional “Your Mom” joke.